grouchy momma fades in real time

walking sideways
baking apple cider cake/writing because I have to
messing up knock knock jokes
dog sitting/grandpa checking/too much just this moment/okay before and after now
precious boy follows me around the kitchen, standing still in my path
my smile forms in half between prayers I forgot to offer when I woke
lego starwars commentary wafts in, between syllables
cake in the oven, I sit on the edge of my bed, hear quiet for the first time in days, when I open my heart to pray, I sing each word
“Is there any Remover of difficulties save God? Say: Praised be God! He is God! All are His servants, and all abide by His bidding!”*
for one friend, for another, a third is given, my smile opens whole
I remember
if we are late to the afternoon party, our sky will stay put/not fall into our eyes/how often do I tell my son to calm him
no longer holding my shoulders too high, moving in freed space, I breathe
when a song about poopy heads wafts by, I even giggle
grouchy momma lingers still, snapping for spilled water, forgotten instructions
but she’s more vulnerable to a boy who tip toes into the kitchen with mismatched socks, asking that we pretend the house is made of magic fire lights (huh?)
*a Baha’i Prayer

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