The idea has been coming to me gradually over the last few days, to write down what I want in our first place in Texas. I've done this in the past with success, but started to feel that I was relying on such writing down of plans more than relying on God. Or rather, I was hoping too strongly that my way would would happen and felt uncomfortable at the thought that God's Will may be something else. This has been my spiritual work lately. To actually want God's Will even if it is not my will. Like moving to Texas. Who really knows if this is God's Will or not, but for now I believe it is since we prayed for 3 weeks, with no realistic solutions in sight and one morning, here comes an idea that still fares well after 2 more days of investigation, more prayer, and consultation.
In Chicago, using this method of writing down what I want in order to manifest it, I found a lovely 1 bedroom on the brown line at the edge of lakeview that had all but one thing I wrote down. It was not in walking distance from work. This turned out to be a blessing(of course) because I found a wonderful center to tutor at a few blocks from home, a writing group that was an off shoot of the adult learning center(to get there I had to walk through a neighborhood full of human sufferiing like I had never witnessed outside of tv. Indeed, I grew from this.), and I was in walking distance to a regular size grocery store. And a block west of clark, so the bus was always available for a spontaneous ride south to be close to the lake.
For our move to Colorado I wrote to manifest again. This time we got all but one or two things. Including being next door to the school we moved there for, a nice yard, 3 bedrooms, in our price range, a window in the kitchen(that actually looked out to the garage that was added on later...oh well), hardwood floors, etc. When we bought Bill and Bahiyyih's house, we kept many of the benefits of our house in Colorado. Across from a park with a path, a small lake, 2 play grounds, hardwood floors.
So I think I'm (hopefully) detached enough to simply write down my hopes for our first place in Texas as a way of setting down what I've learned is important to our family in the hopes of manifesting it. More as a responsible use of this method rather than a way of manipulating so I can be comfortable. Our purpose in moving is to be together as a family and for David and I to be consistent in our involvement with our family, the Baha'i community and all of our friends and at the same time, be true to our visions for the future.
All that said, here it is.
For our first home in Texas, we live in a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom house or apartment. Our neighborhood is clean, safe and quiet with many young children that are good for Devyn and Matthew to play with and befriend. Our home is clean, on the ground floor, and well maintained. We are within 15 minutes of the company David works for.
The boys bedroom is big enough for two twin beds, their dresser, book case, 2 night stands and a fair amount of room to play and walk in, a walk in closet, and at least one good window with a perfectly intact and properly in place screen. Our room is big enough for a queen size bed, our 2 dressers, a small office space equal to what we now have, a walk in closet, and at least one good window also with a perfectly in tact, properly in place screen. There is a full size washer and dryer hook up in it's own closet with a shelf for detergent. The kitchen has ample cabinet and shelf space for what we now use. There is a separate dining area and a large living room with windows that face west/north, also with intact screens that fit properly. In the living room there is a logical and beautiful space where we create a prayer corner. There is a 50 gallon hot water tank, a clean bath tub, a shower and good water pressure.
We are in a good location as far as being economical goes. There are clean safe parks nearby with good shade for hot days. We are fairly close to a Baha'i Center with excellent children's classes that Devyn and Matthew love to attend and a good grocery store that carries a lot of quality organic produce and other organic items. We are close to other families we enjoy spending time with. Our friends feel that coming to our house for devotional gatherings, study circles, potlucks, parties, lunch and dinner gatherings is a simple matter distance wise. Our home is a regular gathering place for these and other joyful and meaningful gatherings. Our neighborhood is a good healthy place to spend time outdoors in relation to who we meet and visit with a lot, low traffic and lots of grass good to run and play in.
That's what I can think of right now.
For now, we are just keeping our house clean, enjoying having a pretty yard for the first time, waiting for an offer on our house we can accept. And continuing to enjoy being with our friends and family here.