Heidi Beth

Hanging out is productive

This is from my yahoo inbox from a daily email to the group. I agree so much I had to share.

"According to the head of psychiatry at Stanford one of the best things that a man can do for his health is to be married to a woman whereas for a woman, one of the best things she can do for her health is to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends.

Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality “girlfriend time" helps us to create more serotonin--a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings whereas men often form relationships around activities.

We share from our souls with our sisters, and evidently that is very good for our health. He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym.

There's a tendency to think that when we are "exercising" we are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged--not true. In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking!

So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health! We are indeed very, very lucky. Sooooo let's toast to our friendship with our girlfriends. Evidently it's very good for our health."

Of course :)

Clean kitchen. What do I want to do? Make a mess.

chocolate mint candies
bean and cheese tortillas with Rotel on top
butternut squash

Then I want to eat it with friends and family.

I'm resting and delighted again

Because we do not rest, we lose our way. We miss the compass points that show us where to go. We lose the nourishment that gives us succor. We miss the quiet that gives us wisdom. Poisoned by the hypnotic belief that good things come only through tireless effort, we never truly rest. And for want of rest, our lives are in danger. - Wayne Muller

Seeing time bend

I was 5 in an apartment on the edge of a suburb, half a block from Chicago's cracked sidewalks, jagged pieces of cement laying next to the weeds pushed up overnight in summer. Our sidewalks were put together, our streets were clean, no litter strewn about,just a quiet street with a park perfect for children. This park had huge climbing trees. I climbed to the top of one by where Subrina Love used to live until she moved away when we were 5. She was my first best friend. She made friendship lovable. I climbed the tree until we moved when I was 10. I didn't understand why I couldn't see Subrina again. Now I see that no adult knew how important she was to me, how dear.

On Saturdays I'd roam the block looking for someone to play with. No one seemed to like romping outside as much as I did. I was an only child. I couldn't figure out what could possibly be more fun than playing at the park all day. Jill liked to read, a lot! She also liked to play outside but I still have an image of her kicked back in her room, book open in front of her, beautiful weather on the other side of her kitchen wall, but I couldn't talk her into leaving her apartment. I do have many memories of us playing together outside, lots of screaming and laughing, lots of silly faces. I don't remember the others names. The blond sisters who must have been 5 years apart, a bunch of faceless boys. Mainly I liked to swing, arm wrestle and climb trees...and run up and down the metal train.

When we moved 2 miles into the same suburb, I gained a back yard and neighbors I knew, who I spent time with. Rupert mentored me in painting fences, caring for turtles and quiet living. Olivia inspired me to love the Cubs for a season, even waiting at a low fence for an autograph. I was 10, she was 13. I was amazed to have such an old friend. In that apartment I memorized the TV guide from 3-10pm for all of 6th and 7th grade. On non sports practice days there I was camped out with a bowl of canned spinach or black olives, eating them with a fork. I had the north bedroom which I kept very clean. I had a cat named Thor. The first night we had Thor, he slept in my room. When I turned off the light, he'd start cleaning himself. I was concerned with the strange slurping noise so I'd turn on the light. Thor would look up from his work, ears perked, curious what I was up to. We did this little dance several times the first night before I solved the mystery and knew he was going to be OK despite the odd noises (Thor was a loud groomer). Eventually I had an am/fm stereo with a turn table. I kept it on my dresser (kept it past my one year of college). The closet was big and empty. I loved to close the door, close my eyes and spin in circles then open my eyes and find the door handle. This is how only children play...for hours. In 8th grade I was part of a close group of friends who HAD to spend at least half an hour on the phone together every night, after spending all afternoon together, and the previous weekend. We made frequent use of 3 way calling.

Happy random memories!

Observations

It's dark at 8pm, crickets in full song.

Owning a house = someone has weeding to do.

Getting rid of unwanted stuff that is being given away involves a cluttered living room for a few days.

Some burned bits are harder to remove from the stove top than others.

I like making new friends.

Helping the boys clean their room is easier than gearing up to do it.

I want to make chocolate mints but need to finish cleaning the stove top first. Chocolate mints are proper motivation or at least effective.

It's easy to over commit to activities that benefit other people.

I like books but I'm diggin' the idea of having only what I get from the library and a few Baha'i books around the house.

When I finish filing the living room will grow, even though the "to file" box is under a desk.

We may only need one big desk in the house but the second one is pretty and holding a lot of stuff I'm not sure what to do with yet.

I like listening to audio books more than video games but since the boys earned the $ for their hand held game boys, I like the tinny song they make (for a while).

We have many pretty figurines that need homes. I'm not sure who would like which ones.

I like the way Bahiyyih's kitchen smells. There's always something yummy making or just made.

Kids rooms and chocolate mints are calling.

What I would have said

If I had been updating my facebook status update all week I may have written:

I cleared all the ingredients, tools and bowls from our storage closet at the bakery today. Our kitchen wall is beautifully lined with large containers of almond, millet, buckwheat and other gf flours.

We gave away a chair today.

We gave away a couch today.

We filled up several boxes of toys, kitchen items, books etc for our garage sale this weekend.

It's hot.

For no reason I made chocolate cake. Actually I had a good reason. I wanted chocolate cake and it was really good!

Day 1 of garage sale started at 2pm. People came at 1:45pm, as soon as the signs went up. I enjoy visiting with people while they browse.

Day 2 of garage sale. I woke up at 6:30am, fixed six of the signs around the neighborhood came back and set all the goodies on our lawn again. I feel strong!

Garage sales are a meditation.

I sit in the house reading a book by the front window. I look up every little while to see if anyone's come by. When people get out of their car I leave the comfort of my air conditioned living room and greet them.

Noon is so hot I'm in an oven. It's still cooler than Texas hot.

We have 4 large and 4 small Corelle plates and 5 Corelle bowls. We have a few cute plastic bowls and a plate. We have a few forks, knives and spoons. Everything else is in the garage sale. Washing dishes takes 15 minutes.

We kept all baking supplies, pans and plastic food storage containers.

I tried parmesan cheese on rice and veggies. My tummy didn't rebel.

Day 2 of parmesan experiment went well.

Day 3 I tried sharp cheddar. My tummy is still happy. Yogurt and butter experiment to follow.

The boys are parting with a lot of toys and books that didn't make it in last years garage sale. This year they had a smaller book shelf to fill. All other books went. They didn't fill their shelf.

We spent a lazy evening with Zivar and her girls and Amy Eades. That is how life should be. We made cheese crisps in the microwave and ate giant pickles from a giant jar. We laughed a whole lot!

We enjoyed a small belated birthday party for Devyn this afternoon and into the evening. It went 3 hours over scheduled time (not a surprise!). We played pictionary, a game David bought at a garage sale years ago that we haven't ever played. What were we waiting for?! We performed a skit Devyn found in Highlights because it has a dog in it. I played the dog. It was a funny little play :).

I've learned many things I'm not writing here. One day I'll tell you all about it, when I write a book.